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Paul Spasic's blog

Marriage Strengthening Tip #17: Do You Disagree, Argue, or Fight?, Part 5

I'll wrap up this five part series on two notes: a) when one of you "wins" in a disagreement, the relationship loses; b) there is a way for the relationship to always win--simply disagree RESPECTFULLY!  Your objective should be to decide the best way forward, no

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #16: Do You Disagree, Argue, or Fight?, Part 4

Now to the very core of the secret as to how you can actually disagree respectfully as opposed to fighting.  Here is a guideline my wife and I utilize, and we find that it takes a lot of hard work to apply it.  Heads-up, you will likely have the motivation to apply it only if you take sc

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #15: Do You Disagree, Argue, or Fight, Part 3

Okay, let's be generous with ourselves and say that only about 75% of the time we start arguing with our spouse is the result of round # ___ of the blame game.  I have a feeling that the next biggest percentage of the time it starts as a result of simply advocating for something we want.

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #14, Do You Disagree, Argue, or Fight?, Part 2

Want to know what will get a marital disagreement off to a bad start from the git-go?

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #13" Do You Disagree, Argue, or Fight?

Marital disagreements or arguments in which you remain civil are not only acceptable, but inevitable.  It's fighting (verbal swordfights) that erodes the relationship, much like relentless ocean waves do a shoreline.  If your goal is to stop arguing all together (even in civil ways), or

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #12: Personality or Attitude?, Part 4

In the final part of this series, I want to give you some specific steps for adapting your personality temperament to that of your spouse.  (Please read Parts 1-3 first).  That famous "love chapter" in Paul's first letter to Corinth tells us that real love does not insist on its' own way

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #11: Personality or Attitude, Part 3

I promised you in Part 2 that I would introduce you to the most signicant reason the Lord joined your two personalities in a dynamic duo.  Here it is: without your spouses' will at time countering your will, you are unlikely to learn that life "your way" is not  the life to the full

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #10: Personality or Attitude?, Part 2

Here's the thing--God purposely created the idea that two personalities, his and hers, should live together in holy matrimony so that their different personalities can complement and supplement one another (see I Corinthians 11:11).  You know, that opposites attract thing?  It's

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #9: Personality or Attitude?, Part 1

One's personalilty temperament is God-given, and for many good reasons and purposes.  A personality temperament test, such as DISC or others, can help you identify your temperament quite definitively.  Go to www.123test.com and click on the bottom option of fr

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Marriage Strengthening Tip #8: The Superglue of Marriage

An informal survey of married constituents of what was at the time the largest Protestant church denomination in the country revealed an astonishing indicator.  The liklihood of divorce decreased from roughly one in two or three to one in almost 39,000 when three factors were present in

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